Hundreds of people sat quietly around me, arms respectfully crossed on their laps, gazes glued to the scene before them.

Some smiled proudly as, one by one, another person stepped on the stage, their pre-recorded life stories projected on the massive screen ahead.

And one by one, a man dipped each of them into a tub of water, making a live testament of their newfound faith.

It was my first time visiting this church. But, admittedly, I wasn't there for the beautiful stories and testaments of faith.

I was there for a man. 😅

Yup. I was dressed in Friday night's best - fishnet stockings and all (God forgive me)!

Okay, let me back up, because you need to know the context:

→ I met a guy at a hobby class (let’s call him Greg).
→ Greg approached me.
→ Greg invited me to coffee.
→ I liked Greg.
→ Greg suggested more hobby classes and hangouts.
→ Greg also invited me to his church.
→ I decided to visit Greg's church on a whim…without telling him.

And next thing I knew, Greg’s long-term girlfriend was on the stage, every angle of her lovely face captured in larger-than-life, theater-quality perfection.

The girlfriend he never mentioned...

And in crystal clear surround sound, as she made her pledge to God, she thanked Greg for being the love of her life as a picture of them, lips locked in unison, floated across the screen.

So, why am I telling you this story?

Yes, yes, I know my life drama is so engaging, but there are actually a few key elements missing here that this story needs in order to really hit home on LinkedIn.

And no, I’m not going to give you “7 copywriting frameworks” (that’s a lot even for seasoned writers).

I’m just going to give you one → my HERO Framework

4 Key Elements of a Story

Hook. Emotion. Relevance. Offer.

I created my HERO Framework to be a simple, 4-step framework that ANYONE could use to help them write better, more engaging stories on LinkedIn that actually work.

…And my fun little story above? It doesn’t hit the mark.

Let’s talk about it 👇🏽

1. Hook

While that first line is an okay opener, it's not really a good hook. Nothing about it would make anyone want to stop rapidly scrolling down their feed to click "see more".

2. Emotion

Now this part was done pretty well. In fact, most people who tell stories, especially personal ones, are pretty good at the emotional connection. It comes a bit more easy to some.

But if showing emotion in your stories is something you struggle with, don’t worry. I have plenty of newsletters coming in the future to help you out!

3. Relevance

Listen up to this part, because this is one of the most important pieces of any story…

And most people on LinkedIn totally miss it.

My story doesn't actually tie any relevance back to my audience.

Meaning, the audience doesn't gain any value from the story (outside of sheer entertainment of course).

So for example, if I wanted to make this story relevant to an audience that was interested in communication techniques, I could add a section after the story that talks about intent versus perception and different ways the reader can employ 3-4 key tactics to lead to clearer communication and less embarrassing outcomes.

That would turn the story into more than just entertainment but would offer valuable takeaways that would be memorable and relevant to the audience.

4. Offer

Now hear me out on this one, because I don't mean that you have to pitch slap someone after every story, but you do need to offer value in some small way and invite the audience to take an action to get that value.

So for example, an offer I could end this off with could look like this:

"P.S. Want to learn the 5 steps to better communication so that you can avoid sticky situations like this? DM me the word FISHNET and let's chat!"

So, to sum it all up, this story had only 1 out of 4 key elements that I talk about in my HERO framework—emotion—and missed the other three (Hook, Relevance, and Offer)

That said, being able to use these 4 key elements of my HERO framework and making sure you hit each one in your LinkedIn posts will make sure you write engaging stories every single time.

It’s Challenge Time!

So, each week, I'm also going to give you all a challenge, because that's how we learn best, right?

I'm sure you noticed that I didn't give an example for the missing hook to my story. Because I want YOU to come up with it.

And don't freak out about not knowing how to write a good hook. For starters, I'm not going to judge you.

But also, I gave you a FREE copy of my Hook Writing Guide when you subscribed...so no excuses!

So, reply to this newsletter with a good hook I could use for this story. Remember, it should only be 1-2 short lines!

I'll read through every submission and pick the best one to actually share this story on LinkedIn (and tag you in the post, of course).

Can't wait to see what hooks you come up with!

See you around LinkedIn,

Cyndyl